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.::Sunshine, Most Times::.

Friday, December 10, 2004

Happy Friday!!

I'm taking a break today. I went shopping for about an hour and a half with mom yesterday, and when we got back to her car, I noticed my ankles were swollen big-time! I could barely get my sandals off when I got home! I hate these meds I'm on, everyday there's a new "kink" in my armour! So I'll do the piddly stuff today, and see how it goes. I'm out of money anyway until payday(s) next week. I leave you all with this- not exactly a joke, more like a "reality" funny! Have a good one! KC
Santa Claus a woman
I think Santa Claus is a woman. I hate to be the one to defy
sacred myth, but I believe he is a she. Think about it...
Christmas is a big, organized, warm, fuzzy, nurturing social
deal, and I have a tough time believing a guy could possibly
pull it all off.
For starters, the vast majority of men don't even think about
selecting gifts until Christmas Eve. Once at the mall, they
always seem surprised to find only Ronco products, socket wrench
sets and mood rings left on the shelves. On this count alone,
I'm convinced Santa is a woman.
Surely if he were a man, everyone in the universe would wake up
Christmas morning to find a rotating musical Chia Pet under the
tree, still in the bag.
Another problem for a he-Santa would be getting there. First of
all, there would be no reindeer because they would all be dead,
gutted and strapped on to the rear bumper of the sleigh amid
wide-eyed desperate claims that buck season had been extended.
Blitzen's rack would already be on the way to the taxidermist.
Even if the male Santa DID have reindeer, he'd still have
transportation problems because he would inevitably get lost up
there in the snow and clouds and then refuse to stop and ask
for directions.
Other reasons Santa can't possibly be a woman:
Men can't pack a bag.
Men would rather be dead than caught wearing red velvet.
Men would feel their masculinity is threatened... having been
seen with all those elves.
Men don't answer their mail.
Men would refuse to allow their physique to be described, even
in jest, as anything remotely resembling a "bowlful of jelly".
Men aren't interested in stockings unless somebody's wearing
Having to do the Ho Ho Ho thing would seriously inhibit their
ability to pick up women.
Finally, being responsible for Christmas would require a
Now, I can buy the fact that other mythical holiday characters
are men, like:
Father Time shows up once a year unshaven and looking ominous.
Definite guy.
Cupid flies around carrying weapons, Uncle Sam is a politician
who likes to point fingers.
Any one of these individuals could pass the testosterone
screening test. But not St. Nick. Not a chance.

Invisioned on |9:36 AM|

* * *

.::About me::.

Wife, Mother, Breast Cancer Survivor!
Die-Hard Def Leppard Fan!!!!!
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