Friday, December 01, 2006
And it couldn't come soon enough for me. I swear this week everyone has been in a lousy mood. Including me, which is very unusual. And since I'm tired as all get-out, I'll just get to the good stuff:
Subject: FW: Divorce?
> A married couple is driving along a highway doing a
> steady 60 miles per hour. The wife is behind the
> wheel. Her husband suddenly looks across at her and
> speaks in a clear voice. "I know we've been married
> for twenty years, but I want a divorce."
> The wife says nothing,
> Keeps looking at the road ahead but slowly increases
> her speed to 65 mph. The husband speaks again. "I
> don't want you to try and talk me out of it," He
> says, "because I've been having an affair with your
> best friend, And she's a far better lover than you
> Again the wife stays quiet, But grips the steering
> wheel more tightly and slowly increases the speed to
> 75 He pushes his luck. "I want the house," he says
> Up to 80 . "I want the car, too," he continues.
> 85 mph. "And," he says, "I'll have the bank
> accounts, all the credit cards and the boat!"
> The car slowly starts veering towards a massive
> concrete bridge. This makes him nervous, so he asks
> her, "Isn't there anything you want?"
> The wife at last replies in a quiet and co ntrolled
> "No, I've got everything I need," she says.
> "Oh, really," he inquires, "so what have you got?"
> Just before they slam into the wall at 85 mph,The
> wife turns to him and smiles. "The airbag."
> Moral of the Story :
> Women are crazy!!!!
> Don't mess with them!!
And just because:
Two bored casino dealers are waiting at the crap table. A very attractive blonde woman from South Alabama arrived ...and be twenty-thousand dollars ($20,000) on a single roll of the dice. She said, "I hope you don't mind, but I feel much luckier when I play topless." With that, she stripped to the waist; rolled the dice; and yelled, "Come on, baby....Southern Girl needs new clothes!" As the dice came to a stop, she jumped up-and-down....and squealed... "YES! YES! I WON! I WON!"
She hugged each of the dealers...and then picked up her winnings and her clothes, and quickly departed.The dealers stared at each other dumfounded. Finally,one of them asked, "What did she roll?"
The other answered, "I don't know... I thought you were watching."
Moral Not all Southerners are stupid.
Not all blondes are dumb.
But all men.....are men
I'm gonna go get some rest. Jon's company Christmas party is tomorrow night, so I have to get a lot done tomorrow, but I'll try to get here to say hi!
Peace and Love,
Invisioned on |6:50 PM|
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